Review: THE UNINVITED (2009)

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Directed by Charles Guard and Thomas Guard, 2009
Written by Craig Rosenberg and Doug Miro based on A TALE OF TWO SISTERS

In an recent response to my original dismissal of Fox television show “FRINGE”, a reader pointed out that I should factor in the general population’s narrowed intake of Science Fiction instead of comparing the show to other similar but less-marketed programs of late.  While I do not think this is a mandatory approach, it is a valid point.  I may not be the greatest genre historian, but when it comes to the new wares, I am a glutton.  It is because of this sin(virtue) that I have perspective enough to see both sides of THE UNINVITED.  On one pole we have the unnecessary and inferior remake of a prized Korean jolter, on the other we have the generic offering made from Hollywood to the malleable minds of teenagers unburdened by experience.

Is it my fault I’ve seen all this before?  Should I be ashamed that I’m not the target audience?  Is this review necessary?  Why am I even considering this line of questioning?  I don’t need to make excuses for someone else’s lack of inspiration.

THE UNINVITED is the film equivalent of the guy at work who pulls me aside to tell a joke I’ve already heard elsewhere.  The problem isn’t that I’ve heard the joke, instead that the new guy telling it isn’t much of a show man.  He’s got nothing new to bring to the table.  People who haven’t heard the one about the Pope and Raquel Welch get a kick out of it, I just nod my head and wait ’til he is done.

Emily Browning plays Anna, a previously suicidal girl who has just been released from a psychiatric ward following the death of her ailing mother.  Daddy (David Strathairn) is now dating a new woman (Elizabeth Banks) and her sister (Arielle Kebbel) is, from all evidence, a boozed up hoe.  Distracting Anna from spending her new found freedom whining on is a mystery surrounding the real culprit behind her mother’s death and whether or not Daddy’s new bang maid is who she says she is.  Oh and there is a ghost that lives under her bed and old farmhouse children who live in trash bags and other inconvenient locations.

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