I Dare You Not to Laugh at the Trailer for BEAR.

Posted by Peter Hall - October 28th 2009 @ 12:14 pm

Look, anyone who reads this site with anything resembling regularity should know that I am always willing to throw down with a movie about a pissed-off, larger-than-life animal.  But the trailer for BEAR, which will be on the sales floor of this year’s American Film Market, is taking things to motivational level that even a Syfy veteran like myself is not ready for.

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  1. October 28th, 2009 | 12:23 pm | #1

    Weirdly, I get the idea there was actually someone that looked at that trailer and said, “Yeah, that’ll sell the SHIT out of the movie!”

  2. Randy
    October 28th, 2009 | 6:06 pm | #2

    Wow, that is bad. Two cool attacking bear movies. One of my all-time favorite movies as a kid, The Prophecy. Mutant grizzlies are born from environmental contamination at a lake and they take out their revenge on the surrounding indians and towns people. Also, featuers an attacking racoon, awesome. Another good one is Night of the Grizzly. Of course you’ll never watch these Peter because I recommended them…

  3. Ripp
    October 28th, 2009 | 7:16 pm | #3

    From what I can tell the movie seems fairly accurate. They make mention of the strict honor code of Bearshido to which all bears are bound, be it grizzly, polar, black, koala, panda, or pedo. They WILL have their retribution.

  4. Cody
    October 28th, 2009 | 10:29 pm | #4

    Retribution, Honor, Sin, Redemption… BEARS!?

    Fucking sold. Pretty sure I can’t die until I hear that entire speech.

  5. October 29th, 2009 | 9:45 am | #5

    Lulz.

  6. October 29th, 2009 | 9:48 am | #6

    I like Ripp.

  7. October 29th, 2009 | 6:27 pm | #7

    If this movie stared Teddy Roosevelt he woulda beat the hell out of both bears and literally shit on their honor within 10 minutes and the movie would be over.

    I really want to see that movie.

  8. November 2nd, 2009 | 12:04 am | #8

    I wonder how many times the car will be rolled over outside of the 19 that were shown in the trailer. Looks amazing.

  9. November 16th, 2009 | 11:22 pm | #9

    “He wants us to choose between sin and redemption!”

    No, you’re thinking of Jesus, not that bear that’s trying to kill you. Common mistake.

    I love the whole “for his honor” stuff, too. I immediately thought of Anchorman. “We bears are a proud race! They must pay for their intrusion.” This whole movie could have been averted if they’d just drop Katow-jo’s name. It’ll get you into most clubs, too.

  10. November 16th, 2009 | 11:24 pm | #10

    Okay, now for a response where I’m not hilarious: I like the idea just fine, but only if they did it all Lake Placid style. This is not Lake Placid style.

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