Don’t Blame TWILIGHT on the ’90s.

Posted by Peter Hall - June 18th 2009 @ 5:17 pm

Scott Weinberg at his newly minted Horror Squad picked up on a vlog from Day of the Woman in which BJ-C ripped into the TWILIGHT phenomenon, so cleverly redubbed TWATLIGHT, as being a sad indicator of what the children of the ’90s are giving back to the horror world.  She went on to sing vlog a swan’s song for what ‘her’ generation is bringing to the table, because ‘we’ weren’t raised on Krueger.

That shit ain’t on us, us being those who grew up in the ’90s, not the ones who were born in the ’90s.  First we’ve got to operate under the false premise that anyone considers TWILIGHT  a horror movie.  I know I don’t.  Do you?  What about you?  No?  That’s because no one in their right mind does, because even a 13 year old knows what is and is not a horror movie.  Is SESAME STREET a horror show because of The Count?  Getouttahere.

So let’s assume the unassumable in that someone with a Dora the Explorer backpack considers TWILIGHT a horror movie.  It’s still not a product of the ’90s.  Stephenie Meyer was born in 1973.  Screenwriter Melissa Rosenberg was born in 1962.  Director Catherine Hardwicke?  1955.  So how is it that the loathed is a product of the ’90’s generation?

It can’t be because of the young adult target audience.  That’s Generation Z, not Y.  That’s for the kids who grew up on BLUE’S CLUES, not INSPECTOR GADGET.  Children of the ’90s – the kind who would have been cognisant enough to watch SCREAM or I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST SUMMER – are no longer young adults, which is just a 2009 way of saying tweens.

But why do I even care?  Well, as a child of the ’90s who hopes to one day bring something to the horror table, I want to make it Crystal Pepsi clear that TWILIGHT was not wrought forth from our ARE YOU AFRAID OF THE DARK loins.  In fact, thinking on it, no one of our generation has yet to bring anything substantial to the horror table.

Correct me if I’m wrong.  I thought maybe Ti West would have been the first, but even he was born in 1980.  Any other youngsters out there with enough clout to have made a movie before they were 25?  I’ve looked up all the Indie talent I can think of and have found none.  So, Day of the Woman, don’t go issuing apologies for sins that aren’t ours.  It’ll be our turn soon enough, no need to jump the gun.

Gets me wondering what will horror from the minds of the ’90s actually bring?  I can’t tell ya ’tils I sees it, but if I was a betting man, I would certainly not lay money on a LAN party being involved.  Either way, it sure as glittery shit is not TWILIGHT.

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rss 17 comments
  1. June 18th, 2009 | 11:11 pm | #1

    If I may speak on behalf of BJ-C here, Pete, I think the reasoning is that the post-1990 generation is to blame not necessarily for creating Twilight, but for embracing it, and encouraging, and validating it as acceptable horror.

  2. Matt Wells
    June 18th, 2009 | 8:26 pm | #2

    I agree B-Sol. I think it’s one of those things that if we ignore, it will go away. Hell, keyboard cat is dying out quickly and that is a shit load more entertaining than this.

    If it won’t go away, just ignore it. There will always be high school girls (and always a Matthew McConaughey to prey on them.) So no matter what, this will be lusted after.

  3. June 18th, 2009 | 11:49 pm | #3

    For the record, I love keyboard cat.

  4. June 19th, 2009 | 12:09 am | #4

    Also, for those interested, it appears that BJ-C has just posted a response here:

    http://dayofwoman.blogspot.com/2009/06/officially-queen-of-twatlight.html?showComment=1245384486384#c2618711843645102760

    I think it helps to clarify things a bit more.

  5. June 19th, 2009 | 8:46 am | #5

    They are letting women write about horror movies now? Oh, and TWILIGHT was written and directed by women. Maybe THAT is the real problem.

    As far as younger horror filmmakers go, the retard that made AUTOMATON TRANSFUSION is a tad younger than West. Does he count?

  6. June 19th, 2009 | 9:19 am | #6

    In an effort to make my previous post seem less offensive, please read “retard” in the style of Zach Galifianakis: http://www.entertonement.com/clips/cvctrcpsgq–He-was-a-retard

  7. June 19th, 2009 | 10:06 am | #7

    Yeah, Brian, that must be it. You’ve nailed it! Thanks for enlightening me.

    Nice blog, by the way. I’d say that you calling someone else out is like Uwe Boll giving a film class.

  8. June 19th, 2009 | 10:14 am | #8

    Brian-You do realize a woman named Debra Hill co-wrote Halloween right? Or maybe Fran Walsh, who co-wrote Dead Alive? Or Women directors…try on
    American Psycho directed by Mary Harron. Kathryn Bigelow, she directed Near Dark. Mary Lambert director of Pet Semetary.

    Yeah, I’m pretty sure that’s NOT the problem.

  9. June 19th, 2009 | 10:47 am | #9

    Geez Louise. I was joking people.

  10. June 19th, 2009 | 10:50 am | #10

    Oh, and my blog is a masterpiece.

  11. June 19th, 2009 | 11:21 am | #11

    Hah!

  12. Birdy
    June 19th, 2009 | 1:06 pm | #12

    As a female who grew up in the ’90’s and despises Twilight, I’m thinking that’s not the issue. I think that it’s a multi-generational bad taste epidemic. My MOTHER likes Twilight (and I’m half tempted to disown her for it).

    As for it being classified as a horror movie…Just having vampires does not a horror movie/franchise make. Especially when the story is just a ripped down, low-grade mock up of Romeo and Juliet. That’s more romance than anything.

    Really horrible, pre-teen romance, that could have been written better as a 13 year old girl’s fanfiction (and probably would have had higher quality writing).

    But don’t mind me, I’ll just be over here wondering how many times Bela Lugosi has spun in his grave over the popularity of this utter crap.

    ….*mumblemumble* Sparkling vampires…*mumble*

  13. June 20th, 2009 | 12:28 am | #13

    BJ-C made her point well in her response when she said that her generation are supporting films like Twilight via purchasing of merchandise, DVD’s pencil cases and that kind of rubbish. May I say, she articulates it well, as opposed to the low brow fishy vagina example above… Unfortunately mainstream audiences do count this in the horror genre due to the ‘supernatural’ themes. One of the only points of kudos I can give Meyers is that she has the kids reading, which hopefully leads them to look for higher quality literature ie: Bram Stoker or Mary Shelley.

    http://www.musingcontinuum.com

  14. June 20th, 2009 | 7:30 am | #14

    Jeez Peter, you got the women of the internet after you for this one.

    I have to say, I still think that whoever this woman is who wrote Twilight really just stole it from some slash writer on the internet.

    What the problem, Ms Harker, is about thinking children (teens?) will start reading higher quality literature is that if it doesn’t have off the wall romance and brooding teenage characters, it’s not going to sell. The closest “upgrade” they’d get is Anne Rice, and really, that’s just as bad.

  15. June 20th, 2009 | 10:33 am | #15

    Ms. Harker, I am not arguing that TWILIGHT is unpopular, nor am I arguing that tweens are not the ones dropping their allowance into the studio coffers. The entire point of my rant and comments elsewhere has been that no person in their right mind thinks TWILIGHT is a horror movie. Just google “What genre is Twilight” and you’ll see that its very supporters believe it is basically everything but horror.

    The only people who think TWILIGHT is a horror movie are the ones out to demonize it.

    I’m sorry you think my idea of inserting some levity into an issue I could truly not care less about is low brow, I guess all the high brow commentary was taken with the phrase TWATLIGHT.

  16. R.J. Sayer
    June 20th, 2009 | 10:48 am | #16

    OH SNAP, PETER!

    ahem. not to be a dick or anything here, but when did it become acceptable to take anything a 19-year-old says seriously?

    i mean, really?

    TWILIGHT is not horror. period. end of story. no fucking discussion. if you don’t accept that right off the bat, nothing you say beyond it matters.

    it’s like trying to convince someone to listen to your argument regarding quantum mechanics after you’ve admitted believing that the world rests on a giant turtle’s back.

    also. 19. i mean, for real.

    as far as i’m concerned, you’re not even a human being until 20.

  17. June 26th, 2009 | 3:14 am | #17

    Oh Jesus Christ. First sexism, now ageism? Go back to your cave Thor.

    And this 19 year old is #3 on Horrorblips. Right beneath STYD and Dread Central. How about dem apples.

    I have the utmost respect for you Peter, but RJ Sayer…you’re being a moron, and I feel sorry for you. I really do. Whenever you have to warn us that you’re being a dick….you’re being a dick.

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