December ’08: Horror’s in Hibernation.

Posted by Peter Hall - December 2nd 2008 @ 8:57 pm

December is typically the slowest month of the year for horror, but few Decembers in recent memory have been this catatonic.  Usually there is at least one genre film that opens on or around Christmas (often just for artificial controversy, cough), but nope, not this go around the sun.  And DVDs?  Forget about it.  You’ve got the new X-FILES movie and ANAMORPH, then twenty or so movies no one has, for good reason, ever heard of.  Surprisingly, THE GIRLS REBEL FORCE OF COMPETITIVE SWIMMERS is coming out this month under the title ATTACK GIRLS SWIM TEAM VS THE UNDEAD, but I in no way whatsoever condone anyone to ever watch it, especially under such an inferior title.

I set out to do a holiday buying guide, but the guide would have gone nowhere.  Recent DVDs are a bust, as are books.  Collectibles aren’t making waves anymore.  AlexCF doesn’t have any new artwork for sale and, well, something of his would have been the crowning item to beg for.

I’m even having a hard time finding horror to casually watch.  Seven OnDemand channels have failed me with their genre offerings, which is why I’m currently watching SHOCKER, a movie that doesn’t want to end.  Man, who’d of ever called the way Peter Berg would turn out?  Anyways… I’ll find some good things to review, I promise, but it’ll take some clawing, so please be patient.

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  1. December 2nd, 2008 | 10:37 pm | #1

    You could always sell out and just post some video game reviews someone else wrote if you’re bored enough.

  2. December 3rd, 2008 | 7:54 am | #2

    i had a new piece up just three days ago! i’m working my hardest, honest! lots of commission work, bills have to be paid ;)

  3. December 3rd, 2008 | 9:18 am | #3

    Yeah, but it sold! (Didn’t it?)

    If the dollar gains on the pound any more, I may just have to commission something…

  4. December 3rd, 2008 | 9:23 am | #4

    yeah its sold, which is good, because i need my stuff to sell! if you don’t get round to commissioning me, i have two pieces being commissioned for a paranormal museum in new orleans, which will be on exhibition mid january.

  5. December 3rd, 2008 | 9:24 am | #5

    oh i do have a two hundred year old dead nuns face for sale.

  6. December 3rd, 2008 | 9:44 am | #6

    I was a big fan of SHOCKER back when it came out on video. (I was kind of a stupid kid.) That and THE HORROR SHOW, both of which involved an electric chair.

  7. December 3rd, 2008 | 9:46 am | #7

    “oh i do have a two hundred year old dead nuns face for sale.”

    And that may just be the best comment ever made on this website.

  8. December 3rd, 2008 | 12:39 pm | #8

    Oh, and believe it or not, you mentioning the movie got the title song stuck in my head.


  9. December 3rd, 2008 | 6:19 pm | #9

    I fucking hate Shocker. Hated it then, hated it last month when I caved since it’s part of my collection as the other side of THE PEOPLE UNDER PETER HALL’S STAIRS.

  10. December 3rd, 2008 | 6:20 pm | #10

    P.S Will Goss likes this song:

  11. December 3rd, 2008 | 6:21 pm | #11

    Hey, these tappin’ toes couldn’t lie.

  12. December 3rd, 2008 | 8:07 pm | #12

    When’s Trick ‘R Treat supposed to come out?

  13. December 3rd, 2008 | 10:00 pm | #13

    Sean: Never, with our luck. All we’ve got is RJ’s incoherent frothing..

    Scott, great, now you said it out loud and people will join the damnable squirrels already living, literally, in my walls.

    If you know anyone who needs to record Foley sounds of death crawling in walls, point ’em my way. It’s all I hear when I go to sleep.

    Not to mention I live in the woods, in a house with multiple people having multiple ghost sightings. MTV could bring back FEAR at this place.

  14. R.J. Sayer
    December 4th, 2008 | 2:10 pm | #14

    this is exactly why December is a great month to catch up on all the stuff you may have missed. remember that list we made for you a while back, Peter? No way have you already blazed through all of that…

  15. R.J. Sayer
    December 4th, 2008 | 2:11 pm | #15

    And as for books, I won’t be content with any of your bullshit excuses until i see a review for “A Winter Haunting” or “Carrion Comfort” up here…

  16. February 10th, 2012 | 9:00 pm | #16

    Fun post! Didnt bore me a bit and it was nice to "get to know" you! Looks like you have a 30K this weekend! Good luck!!

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