Abominable is an unstoppable good time, the single most admirable straight-to-DVD film in years and flatly the best cryptozoological horror ever made. Supremely ambitious, never compromising personality for cheap satisfaction, Ryan Schifrin’s ripped open the cabin bound terror tale with the same fervor of a fat kid ripping open a bag of Utz Sour Cream chips: All smiles, all appetite, all fury.
I fail to understand why any monster movie is instantly dubbed schlock. People cannot, for some reason, concede that monsters can be, and should often be, taken seriously. I know that the sheer oppressive volume of terrible STD horror comes with weighted expectations, but even still it seems that no positive review of something like Abominable can escape the loose qualifier, “it is pretty good for, ya know, a cheesy monster movie.”
No. It isn’t just pretty good for a cheesy monster movie. It is, without qualifier, a good movie. If anything movies like Abominable, which are as rarely sighted as the creatures they portray, deserve even more credit for being good films despite people’s expectations otherwise. Not everyone has a limitless budget. Most importantly, not everyone has talent. When I find a movie where everyone involved had more talent than financing, it honestly pisses me off to hear people put an asterisk next to any praise. Is it really that hard to appreciate something separately for what it is, not what it is categorically a part of? Admit it surprised you, but don’t be embarrassed about it. Abominable isn’t embarrassed of what it is, neither should you be.
Matt McCoy is Preston Rogers, a crippled man ordered by his doctor to return to the cabin site of his fateful mountain climbing accident. Escorted by a creepy orderly, Preston has little else to do but stare out the windows at a neighboring cabin, which just so happens to currently be rented out for an all girls getaway. It doesn’t take long before the lumbering giant shows up, preying on a mixture of girls and local hunters. Trapped in a cabin with downed phone lines and confined to a wheelchair, Preston tries his hardest to warn everyone he can.
Obviously there is a very strong Rear Window current running through the character of Preston Rogers. This is an inspired transplanting of ideas and settings. It allows for some intense moments and a great vessel for Matt McCoy to act his wide-eyed, Lloyd Braun in a chair ass off. As if Dee Wallace in the opening scene wasn’t enough, Lance Henriksen and Jeffrey Combs share a few great on screen moments.
Bigfoot himself is a commanding beast and Ryan Schifrin found all the right people to bring him to life. His presence is believable and, most shockingly, his behavior is terrifying. There is, for once, valid gore in a sasquatch picture. Not enough to drench the serious hand at play in complete silliness, but enough to pry watching jaws open again and again.
I think the greatest testament I can offer to just how much I loved Abominable is thus: In a day that saw 8 films – 7 great, 1 bad – Abominable was easily the most fun to be had not only by me, but everyone else in the room. And this was a day where the competition comprised of The Tripper, Hatchet, Black Water, 13 Beloved, Shrooms, Alone and Wrong Turn 2. Save for, perhaps, Shrooms, every single one of those flicks had a bigger budget, bigger cast and just plain bigger production backing, but not a single one had the same big, hairy, bloody heart as Abominable.